Chapter 6 ~ Forgive Me

Unlike the last chapter, this one if my favorite.

If you know me, this statement didn't come as a surprise.

Grace. Forgiveness. Release. Absolute cleansing.

Holy Spirit filling, life altering, guilt resolving, regret removing and attitude adjusting grace.

Are you with me?

I love Max's illustration of a tattoo, it really fits the condition of the heart that struggles with forgiveness.

I would ask the same question Max proposes... "If your unresolved guilt manifested itself in tattoos, how marked up would you be? What images would you see in the mirror? All the could'ves and should'ves." (pg 58-59) What comes to mind?

He continues... "The consequences can be ugly. Unresolved guilt sires a gaggle of unhealthy emotions. Most of them fit under one of two headings: defensiveness or defeat...

Defensive souls keep the skeleton in the closet. Tell no one. Admit nothing. Seek innocence, not forgiveness. Life is reduced to one aim: suppress the secret. Failures go unaddressed and untreated. Defensive souls builds walls around the past.

Defeated Souls, on the other hand, are defined by the past. They didn't make mistakes; they are mistakes. The didn't foul up; the are foul-ups. They don't hide the past; they wear it on their sleeves. They cudgel themselves with doubt and shame.

Is guilt having its way with you? ...God specializes in guilt removal. He can do what no one else can: extract every last mark from your soul."

I want to add something here, maybe it will be helpful. Often, those who feel like there is a burden of guilt or shame being held over their heads, tend to do the same to others.

Run this rabbit trail with me for a minute and we'll finish up the chapter after.

Paul wrote... "Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you." (Ephesian 4:31-32 Message)

I know this issue quite intimately. I've been the one who has been forgiven, only to hold bitterness and unforgiveness towards another believer.

Why?

My lack of understanding of this truth... To forgive is not to release the person who hurt you from the consequences of their actions, but to release you from the prison which is poisoning all the other relationships in your life.

To forgive is to allow God to spend the energy needed to bring the offender to the place he knows they need to be. Paul wrote this to another one of the churches that were looking for the correct way to serve the Savior... "Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it[i] to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." (Romans 12:19, 21 ESV).

I left out verse 20 on purpose. It's tough enough to trust God to do what is right in the life of a person who has deeply hurt you, let alone do anything nice for them. So, for now, let's just focus on putting ourselves in a place of freedom.

Why add this to the message of this chapter?

The poison of a heart full of guilt, shame, and regret is such a deep abyss that sucks out the enjoyment of our relationship with God.

How would you like to enjoy your salvation more?

Then, let God remove the tattoos you're still holding on to.

Stop talking about what you did or what someone else did to you.

Give that energy draining, emotion ruining, life sucking part of your heart to God. Then, as we spoke of in the last chapter, he can heal you. Bringing fresh air and clean water to a landscape of dead vegetation where you're always digging up something to see how damaged it is.

Whoa Bill, you don't know me!

You're right, I don't. But I know me.

I know hundreds of lives who have walked into my office looking for healing and absolution.

I've seen marriages, jobs, churches, families, friends and so on, in complete disarray and shambles.

Why?

By either covering up or cudgeling.

Back to the chapter for a much needed next step in our growth and understanding.

"Understand: guilt is God's idea." (pg 60)

In other words, don't just act like you shouldn't feel pain when a wrong is done, whether by you or someone else.

Max continues... "He uses it the way highway engineers use rumble strips. When we swerve off track, they call us back. Guilt does the same." (pg 60)

"If you are in Christ, your sin is gone." (pg 62)

"His resurrection gives us power over sin." (pg 62)

"Open yourself to the idea of a guilt-free you." (pg 62)

"He sees a revision of your script." (pg 63)

""The son of man has power on the earth to forgive sins" (Mark 2:10.) Period. End all discussion. He has the final word on your life. And his word is grace." (pg 63)

"Jesus did his part." (pg 63)

"Now do yours." (pg 63)

"Pray...Father you are good. I need help. Forgive me..." (pg 63)

"Exactly what is it that you need forgiveness for? For being a bad person? That is too general. For losing patience in the business meeting and calling your coworker a creep? There, you can confess that." (pg 63)

"Tell guilt where to get off." (pg 64)

"And, for heaven's sake, stop tormenting yourself." (pg 64)

"Jesus is strong enough to carry your sin." (pg 64)

"The time has come for a fresh start, a fresh slate." (pg 65)

"God does not see the marks of your past." (pg 65)

"God has written your name where he can see it. In the end, that is the only tattoo that matters." (pg 65)

Amen Max. I agree...

What do you think?

P.S. Here is one of my favorite phrases from Paul's letter to the Galatian church...

"For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery." (Galatians 5:1)

The Message paraphrases it this way, I like the idea... "Christ has set us free to live a free life. So take your stand! Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you." Never let anyone, not you nor another person you're holding ill will towards, put a harness of slavery on you.

Thank for taking the time to wrestle and grow with me...